End of year thoughts

Semi-winter. The Falls are frozen, mostly...but the highway is dry. Very different from this time last year when as much as 20 inches of snow fell in December. Our first look at the Falls when "frozen"...usually the highway is closed due to snow and ice, and it's impossible to get there.

Not sure I'll continue this blog. Not sure anyone but me is out there. A while since I've updated...health issues for, hectic work schedule, family visits. Too much to write about, unsure where to start. Almost too tired to put the thoughts together...and I keep an old fashioned journal, so it's a lot of thought collection to deal with.

I hope this has mattered to someone, that they've endured my rants, smiled at the animal antics, understood the frustrations of declining health and the health care issues. My thought is to continue my journal, using a fountain pen, thoughts that family might read long after I'm gone. If I'm back in the new year, you'll know I changed my mind.

So I leave you with this shot of the great natural world we've found in Oregon. Much more to explore when health and finances permit. May 2010 be a better year, and may it be full of pleasant surprises.

Struggling for a healthy life

And we are...after five long years we're hoping that we've finally hit on the right professional, the right doctor, the one who figures out what's up with us and gets us on the right path. Since we've lived in our current home, we've had three doctors. We've interviewed several each time we've made a switch, done our best to ask questions, check things out. We've made our choices and still managed to be disappointed each time. Not enough attention to what we were saying, not enough follow through. I get upset if , when I need a med refilled, I get a call from the drs office asking if I know why I take the med in question. We do not like "machines"...those larger and larger offices of six, or eight, or ten doctors, with procedure services on the next floor, who own the building.
Too often we have found that someone is not listening, and it's not us. Too many unanswered questions, too easily a med is given for symptoms, but the underlying cause is unknown. NO MORE!! We have finally found a practice that gets it, that melds western and eastern medicine. That can tell us why a test is needed, what they think they'll find, and the path to righting our listing ships.
Health care is a struggle in many ways, insurances costs, out of pocket costs, test that in the end show nothing...which is positive and negative at the same time. Putting together all those puzzle pieces and making sense of the assortment of symptoms...and taking it one step further...finding the root cause of our distress. I want intelligent doctors that are engaged. I want insurance that doesn't presume to know as much about medicine as my doctor. I want a system that works, people that are bright and accountable. So, we're slowly finding that. I can hunt for better doctors...it's a pain in the ass, but I can...and if need be, I will. So, I have yet to find intelligent insurance...that helps me, not penalize me, not try to tell me what meds I should need, or what treatments help 85% of all patients. I want care in all senses that works for me...not that someone else says should work, but that I SAY WORKS. We can find the medical professionals we need...we need help getting the insurance to go with that...

Seasons and Sports

The calendar hasn't verified it yet, but it's fall. Baseball is all about the playoffs. Pro football is almost out of preseason...and college football is underway. I saw an exercise in poor judgement last night, by players on opposing teams. One, on the winning team, taunted and tapped the shoulder of a player on the losing team. The loser punched the guy square in the jaw. His season ended then. The player who started it will be "disciplined", but not suspended. They should both have been suspended for several games...the guy who threw the punch for more...but they both should have been suspended. Not how the game should be played or represented. Sad for both teams.

On the other hand, right now my baseball team looks headed for the playoffs. They are doing well and I'm not saying any more, lest I jinx them.

The same is true of my college team. They won tonight and showed good defense and the new offense guys did well. I've been out of college for a long time, but I am thrilled when they are on tv up here as I rarely see them play. But, tonight I did and I'm proud of their effort.

Oh, and the leaves are starting that change of seasons too. Not just sports...trees are losing leaves, leaves are changing color. The smell of fall is in the air and cold, rainy nights are not too far away now. Fall, it's the best time of the year...

Fuzzy Logic

I must admit to some confusion. I'm not sure what a "true American" is. If you are not a true American, does that mean you are an immigrant, a "naturalized" citizen, an illegal? Does it mean you belong to a specific party, live only in certain states, adhere to a certain set of principles? Do you wear a flag pin to show you are a true American, only wear red, white, and blue, carry a gun in public?
So, I'm confused. I think "true" is not a good word here. You are an American, or you aren't. You may have been born here, or became a citizen. You live here. You like Chinese food, or you don't. Baseball is the American Pastime...or maybe it's football. You believe that the 2nd Amendment gives you the right to carry a gun (concealed or not)...or you believe that the Amendment refers to a "standing militia". You are religious, or you aren't. You are white, or black, or anything in between. You are gay or straight. You live in one of 50 states, or the state of confusion, or the state of despair, or the state of euphoria.
You are a native, ancestors here to greet the Europeans, and you live among the rest of the populace, or on the reservation that "true" Americans put you on. You have accumulated wealth, you live in poverty. You are for big business, you are for the "little guy". You are idealistic, pragmatic, young, old.
"True" Americans? We don't all think the same, worship the same. We are not all "created equal"...even though the Constitution would have us believe so. We are a melting pot...but we want everyone to think and do as we do. We are open-minded, but we are also close-minded. We are fair, we cheat. We are saints and we are sinners. We embrace everyone...except those we don't. We are truthful, we lie when it suits us.
We are all these things, and we are all Americans. So I think to say that some of us aren't, because we fail to be and do as other "true" Americans do, is... well, pathetic. We should never be lemmings...all marching to the same tune. It is the varying voices that bring perspective, ideas, approaches...all things we may not have thought of. We are better when we value everyone, and when we help those who need it. We are better when we recognize that all of life is shades of gray, and very little is truly black or white. Our politics, religion, scientific beliefs may vary widely...but none of those things make us less American, less patriotic. We succeed or fail together. The founding fathers understood this; do we?

Heat wave of the Century

Here in the Pacific Northwest we find summer to be the shortest season. Less hot than the rest of the country. Ah, not true this week. Oregon and Washington are having record heat. No, not 85 or 90. The past two days it's been 106 in the Portland area, 103 in Seattle today. Now, in Dallas or Phoenix, or Tulsa this is not an issue. Yeah, it's hot, but there is abundant air conditioning. Up in the NorthWest? Air conditioning comes from the ocean; it's the "on shore" flow of cool ocean air that dominates our weather. Uh, except this week.

We are drinking lots of iced tea and water. We are watering our gardens morning and night. We are buying air conditioners and fans at an incredible pace. Personally, we are lucky. We had air conditioning added to the house when we bought it. No, it did not have it before. Just as many homes and apartments still do not come with it...old or new. The kids all have portable units now to cool things off. Hopefully. By early next week it will be cooler and rainy...with luck. More normal...whatever that means.

The upside is that this is still a rare event. A week or ten days above 90 (in a row) is very rare here...and that helps make it tolerable. Not comfortable to live through, but tolerable. Less cooking this week, more salads and fruit. Less driving, so less pollution and less gas guzzling. Lots of water though as plants wilt under the glare of the sun. Great from helping blueberries ripen, not so great for flowers and young trees.

That's the way it is...even as fall color beings to appear in selected spots.

Random thoughts

First, the weather. Several days of upper 80s to upper 90s have given way to clouds, mist, and a very nice breeze. Cool is back...which is why we love the Pacific Northwest!

Second, color. This dahlia sits in a pot in our back yard. I love it for it's shape and it's range of colors. Color...nothing like mother nature to provide lots of it. Man? Tends, by and large, to limit color. Yes, we have all seen the bold folk with a purple house, or a blue house with blue trim. Rather than applaud, we ask ourselves what the heck they were thinking. So, not all color is appropriate everywhere. At least that's what conventional wisdom would say. So, we may go bold on a house, or with interior walls...but what about our cars? White is about the most popular color (shows dirt sooo easily too). Black, red, blue, silver. The occasional gold or metallic soft brown. No, I'm not advocating the oranges and lime greens of the early 70s. Still, our color palettes are boring. I do not think "dahlia pink" is a good color for a car. But we see so many cars every day. Wouldn't it be nice to have some variance in color? Think about it.

Third...Sarah Palin. As a woman, I'm embarrassed. Palin is catty, nakedly ambitious, uninformed, certain that we all really want to embrace conservative values. Wow...not so much. I do not want to shoot wolves, moose, or anything else from a helicopter or a plane. I am not against abortion regardless of circumstance. I can name the newspapers and magazines I read. I would not call only those who agree with me "true Americans". I would not advocate abstinence only knowing my daughter was pregnant; I would not drag my family to all campaign events then be upset when media bring them into the conversation. I would not accuse someone else of "palling around with terrorists", nor would I try to paint opposing viewpoints as anti-American. I will only add that I hope her time in the garish spotlight is ending and we can all move on. She needs to understand that she doesn't represent all Americans. And it is wrong to make us all over in the image of any one person's ideals. William F. Buckley was conservative, but he was also a thinker. Conservative and religious conservatives are not exactly the same thing. I won't mess with you, so please...leave me alone. My liberal leaning suit me just fine.

Fourth...ah...it was a very nice 4th of July. Family, clear skies, music, fireworks. Patriotism, love of country, joy in the birthday of America. No politics, just a celebration. Here's hoping yours was safe and happy.

No picture yet, just words

In the midst of all this unseasonably warm weather, a present better than any at Christmas...for the first time in 13 years my oldest and I live in the same city. Now, this is not to lessen how wonderful it's been to live reasonably close to the youngest. And the grandson. That time has been truly valuable and I wouldn't trade it. But I missed the oldest, and long hoped she would head to the left coast as I did.

Tonight they are in their new place, just beginning to understand where they are. Not aware of much yet, other than nights are cooler than in Texas. A nice bonus. Jobs must be found, learning how to get around, where things are, all that. But the smiles say a lot...even though they are tired from three days of driving. Our smiles say a lot too...finally our kids are all in the same state!

Changes

Changes come in many forms. Winter, Spring, Summer, Fall. New life, death. New job, loss of job. Leaving home, coming home. Leaving one state, coming to a new one.
This change is hopefully a good one. A new life, new challenges, new places to explore, new jobs to find. The picture was taken two years ago, just over a year before they were married.
Now they are living their last week in Texas before coming to Oregon. Jamie has been there 11 years, Darren off and one for nearly 20. But finally life is changing and Texas will be something they see in the rear view mirror.
Challenges? You bet. Jobs, maps, finding places to eat, drivers tests, medical stuff. Different pharmacy, different restaurants, different landscape. Changes.
Four seasons, not two. Mountains and hills, not flat earth in all directions. Green, not brown. More liberal, less conservative. (not all of Oregon, but true in the Portland area) More green from the standpoint of nature, recycling, and other such stuff. Changes.
Better and easier when you are young. ;-) A new city, state, to explore and learn. New approaches, different ideas. Same country, but a different world. Changes. Ahhhhh...

It's seasonable

There is an "up" side and a "down" side to having 4 seasons. With 4 seasons you get spring and fall color, some warm for summer and mowing the grass, and some cold for winter and maybe shoveling snow. Maybe. If you don't like heat, you try to live where summers are short. If you don't like snow, you live where it doesn't snow. But, moving from 4 seasons to 2, or 2 seasons to 4 can be a shock to the system.

I spent much of my life in the south. Spring could become summer very quickly, and fall was slow to arrive. Winter was usually cold, windy, maybe wet. In California, we had hot and mild seasons, wet and dry. But I missed all the spring and fall color. The true markers of changing seasons.

Oregon? Four seasons, and summer is the shortest. Great, since heat is not well tolerated any more. Fall rolls into winter and then into spring...all wet seasons. The chill of winter bookmarked by the changing of leaves in the fall to the blooming of azaleas, rhoddies, redbuds, dogwoods, tulips, primrose, well you get the idea...spring! Fall color starts with subtle changes in August and over 2 months of color until all the leaves are gone with November wind and rain. Spring starts in March as things begin to bud and in April flowering trees take off.

I considered illustrating with a number of photos...but spring is different everywhere. So I am reverting to something old...imagination. We all have images that we conjure up when any of the seasons is mentioned. We remember favorite places or see places we knew as children...and we all favor different seasons.

So, after a warm weekend and lots of sun, color is really making an entrance. And even though today is cloudy and cool, we can feel more warm, sunny days ahead. And more things will bloom, and the weather will get warmer, and the grass will need mowing again. Stop a minute and remember. What's your favorite season?

Critter update

There is good news to report today. This morning we had skunk #2 hauled away. Trapping with cinnamon dipped marshmallow seems to work well. Two skunks in 2 days, not bad. And they will go off and live away from the urban environment..and the cats and our poor dog (still has skunk breath) can begin to get their yard back.
We will continue to set traps for a while. If nothing more is caught in a week or so, we are likely done. If we catch others we are decreasing the chance of litters being born right in our area. Some critters just do not mix with urban or suburban settings. I know, they were there first...but ours is an older, established neighborhood. Maybe the green space we are near is like a pathway...and bird feeders and fruit trees provide them with part of their diet. I don't want to risk harm to our own animals though...I assume the dog would get sprayed repeatedly. She's just that way.
So for now, humans 2...mother nature 0. We'll see how it goes...

Not all crises are horrific

I would not have said this a few days ago...commuter plane crash, stumbling economy, torture questions...these are all big picture items. Step down from 50,000 feet to ground level and you get job loss, health issues...still horrific when rolled up into one package. And, at the same time...you get smaller crises too...I can't find my keys! Where is the checkbook? I have a flat tire?!?!?!

Monday night, very late we had just one of THOSE crises. After midnight we took the dog out, one last trip before bed. Just in the back yard. Except we had visitors. Two skunks...not one, tow. Of course, the dog was sure they wanted to see her...and they did. They fired a warning shot, a glancing blow, and exited the yard. The dog ran around, did her business, and then was captured for a bath. We were up until 3 a.m. drying and reassuring her.

Apparently, said skunk was looking at the dog when the shot went off. Hit the fence and showered down on the dog...mostly on her head. No eye problems, no running around and wiping off on all the furniture. Just this lingering smell...all through the house and in select spots on the dog. I think the worst is when she opens her mouth...skunk breath. Not horribly strong, but obvious. And inside her left ear...that's about it. The smell in the house has died down, thankfully.

Just as thankfully, we have hired someone to capture them and give them a home in a forest miles away. Nothing caught the first night, but I think the dog also scared them a bit. So this was a crisis...worthy of the Three Stooges, funny looking back...not funny at all when it happened. Stay tuned for updates on skunk capture!

Consider this

You discover your car is leaking oil...not much, so you decide to put off doing anything about it. Over time it gets worse. But, instead of dealing with the problem, you have the car detailed. Car looks great, but wait. What about the real problem, the oil leak? Well, it continues to leave puddles wherever you go. Until the day the lack of oil freezes your engine block. Ah, you cannot ignore the problem now. The car is useless unless you deal with the leak, and you have the added expense of replacing the engine. Ouch!

This is not my story, it is an analogy that Pat came up with...and we were discussing the budget issues in California (grateful we no longer live there). California is in many ways a mini-America. Eighth largest economy in the world. Two thirds majority required to pass a budget...and unable to do so in a timely manner for as long as I can remember. Thankfully one was passed in the wee small hours of this morning. The problem is California mirrors the current American problem.

To deal with the oil leak is like dealing with the economic issues head on. Infrastructure spending...oil is necessary for the car to run. The detail job is like window dressing...ah, tax cuts. Without infrastructure spending you get a sink hole on the 215 freeway..all the tax cuts in the world will not fix that sink hole. But, infrastructure spending will give jobs to the folks who evaluate and repair that hole...and traffic moves freely again. Or as freely as traffic moves on any California freeway.

So, why is this so hard? Some say...debt, huge debt...don't do it!! If we don't, what happens? We have politicians, not elected servants of the public. We have window dressing, "See, we're looking out for you. Saving your kids from massive debt." Instead we will have roads, bridges, schools, etc. that fall into disrepair...or collapse. And routes we used to take regularly are gone, detours must be found. Ah, using more gasoline and increasing our dependence on foreign oil.

It's a long look. Maybe it happens, maybe not. I would rather the extra cash in my paycheck had gone to infrastructure jobs. Stimulus, you know. And, no matter what you do, it needed to happen months ago. Nothing we do will turn things around today, or tomorrow, or next week. But let's not make this a political argument. Let's really make it about helping our citizens. Anyone can be a politician. What we need are statesmen. People who work to provide for the common good and promote the general welfare. For everyone. Period.

As the world turns

Today is a bright, sunny day. A cold wind, but brilliant sunshine. In January, in Oregon. No, we are not rainy every day. It's a good day to have a birthday. My grandson is 2 today. Growing in size, in vocabulary, in thought and idea. Growing in understanding, of who he is, of what he can do. It's an interesting journey to watch.

In times like these...it's hard to notice the little things. There are so many things out of whack in the world and they are on the front page of every paper, every day. They are the big news stories each night. Ah, until a plane lands in the Hudson and no one dies. Suddenly we are less down on ourselves...something good happened. Something that could have been horrible turned out to be uplifting. Positive. And we all think about what we would have done.

What I plan to do is enjoy today and my grandson. I plan to enjoy tomorrow and the changing of the guard, the passing of the torch to a generation that I am really too old to belong to. That my children embrace. But I will enjoy today, it's cold wind and bright skies. The birds all hunting for food and shelter, and finding some of both in my back yard. I will enjoy the energy of our little dog...energy that is boundless, running and chasing just for the joy of it.

Yes there are wars, times are hard for all of us...around the world, uncertainty abounds. But today I will watch trees sway in the wind, shadows fall as the sun sets...and remember that a good day is one we live through. A good day is one we can see and touch and smell. A good day is the sound of a little boy turning 2.